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Understanding the Rising Trend of Cuckolding, the Origin, Positives and Misconceptions

By Orin 5 years ago. Posted in Relationship Advice
Understanding the Rising Trend of Cuckolding

Cuckolding is a term that has been floating around the world of modern sex for a while. For some, there exposure to cuckolding is limited to Facebook memes. Leaning more towards making fun of someone whose girlfriend is cheating on him and he's simply accepting that. This is not the true definition of cuckolding. However, such memes have spun the definition of the term "cuck" as someone who is more of a sexual pushover instead of an acknowledged role of humiliation within consensual sex. Anyway, whether cuckholding is your thing or not, this article serves to help everyone in understanding one of the most popular sex fetishes of recent years.

The origins of cuckolding

The term cuckolding was inspired by the cuckoo bird, which lays its eggs in another bird's nest. Whenever the moment strikes, the bird will push one of the original eggs out of a nest, to replace with one of its own. The entire process takes about ten seconds!

cuckoo bird The original bull.

We can see how this is a sexual metaphor for the human version. The original egg representing the role of the cuckold.

I know the concept of this will make a lot of people shake their heads or even entire bodies in rejection to the idea. The ideas of monogamy have been drilled into modern society, this is perhaps why cuckholding is so taboo. When it comes to sex, you're into what you're into, so rejecting the idea is a completely natural reaction! However, its still a good idea to take some time to understand what it's all about and why some people are really into it.

What exactly is cuckholding?

Cuckholding is a sexual fetish where a partner derives sexual pleasure from watching or knowing their partner is having sex with another partner. Typically, this is for heterosexual couples, where the man takes the role of the cuckhold.

So, there are three usual roles, the man ("cuckhold") the significant other (the "hot wife") and the outsider (the "bull").

cuckhold From the POV of a cuck.

We can begin to understand that cuckholding is sometimes a form of erotic humiliation. This is what sets it apart from other fantasies, like swinging. Similar to many scenarios within BDSM, some people find desire in degradation. This can be through physical contact, being spanked or verbally through demeaning comments. During cuckholding it's common for the cuck to be ordered around or made fun of his for being less endowed than the bull. "You have a small penis, now bake us a cake!" Sex and a sponge cake is a pretty sweet deal if you ask me, sensually and taste wise.

The cuckhold role can involve many things. Sometimes they may be referred to as a "footcuck" where they become a foot slave to the wife and bull. Other times, they may be completely bound with bondage toys, unable to move or speak. Usually, their dominant hand has adequate movement, if you know what I mean.

So, it's a very intense scenario. Involving feelings of humiliation, shame, domination, submission, maybe even a bit of jealousy. It's here where I must emphasise that there is nothing unusual about such fantasies. Especially we need to acknowledge that the desire does not represent something pathological about those involved. During an intense rejection of cuckholding, people like to imagine the cucks life as some sort of pathetic existence that shouldn't take part in society. Again, it's just a sexual fantasy and has nothing to do with anything outside of that context.

The positives

Many relationships prosper from taking part in cuckholding!

Sexual satisfaction

There are many examples of partners who have gone their entire life who have an undying itch to explore certain fantasies. The result of trying to reject their own desires have resulted in infidelity, despression and even substance abuse.Couples who take part in cuckholding are fully embracing their sexuality. Cuckholding with confidence may reinforce that you’ve found the perfect partner for you!

It's carthartic

romantic-1934223 1920 Image Source: Pixabay

Instead of fearing the idea of your partner cheating, you are taking control from it and enjoying it. A sociologist once wrote "we need to consider that anyone "composing" such a fantasy (however scandalous or shocking) is nonetheless exerting a kind of mastery over it—consciously choosing to dramatize a scenario that, in his mind's eye, is tantalizing."

Sexual positivity and non-judgement

There are a lot of kinks that people find hard to discuss or express to their partner. Couples that enjoy cuckholding become open-minded to a plethora of pleasure. Discovering kinks that never knew they had or having a better understanding as to why others enjoy different practices.

Better communication

romance-1934204 1920 Image Source: Pixabay

Couples who take part in cuckholding establish new levels of intimacy together. Being able to communicate our most taboo feelings and have them be acknowledged and understood can be very empowering for a couple. Sexual progression is a way of building a solid foundation in many relationships.

However, cuckholding can go wrong!

If you think that you may enjoy being a cuck. It's something that you need to be absolutely sure about beforehand!

There have been stories of partners leaving men after the suggestion. Another man had been left twice by his wife, who preferred the bull who joined afterwards.

Some partners feel that the fetish replaces makes it seem that they are no longer desirable by their man. Where they feel unloved or unwanted outside the rules of a traditional relationship

One man said after many years of cuckholding scenarios. He found that he no longer felt any desire at all to have sex with his girlfriend. Completely reducing himself to a frisky fly on the wall.

Generally, if the fantasy isn't desirable by both partners, it has a high likelihood of going wrong. So a lot of communication and discussion needs to take place!

Perhaps watching porn together or having a threesome may be some steps to consider first!

Something relevant to watch!

Below is a Ted Talk that discusses infidelity. Where Esther Perel discusses how cheating can actually save a relationship. Could cuckholding be an answer to infidelity that prevents any hearts being broken? Just something to consider.

Video sourced from Ted Talks (Esther Perel)

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Orin
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